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Saturday, June 27, 2009

My Girl, For His Glory




I really struggled with this month's post. It seems like I have run out of words to express my loss of Rylan. I wish there was something else I could say or do to bring her back, ease the pain, or calm my heart. In the grieving process, I have learned that sometimes it is okay and beneficial just to be still and listen to God. There are many days in the past nine months where I wanted to pray but felt at a loss for words and simply prayed "Thine Will Be Done" and "Use Rylan's Life and Death for Your Glory and Your Purpose. Amen."

I still greatly miss my daughter, but I am making it, pulling through, and staying in the "LIGHT" because of God's grace and faithfulness.

Here are a few passages from one of my favorite books, Holding on to Hope, by Nancy Guthrie.

For what purpose? For what purpose did my four day old daughter die? For what purpose is my college friend, age 32, battling cancer? For what purpose is a friend's three year old spending his days going through chemo instead of having the opportunity to run and play like a regular little boy?

To display the glory of God is the answer. How do you display the glory of God? You reflect his character. Instead of demanding an answer, you decide to trust him, recognizing that your circumstances provide an unparalleled opportunity to glorify God just by your trust in his unseen purpose.

Trusting God when the miracle does not come, when the urgent prayer gets no answer, when there is only darkness--this is the kind of faith God values perhaps most of all. This is the kind of faith that can be developed and displayed only in the mist of difficult circumstances. This is the kind of faith that cannot be shaken because it is the result of having been shaken.

That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are quite small and won't last very long. Yet they produce for us an immeasurably great glory that will last forever! So we don't look at troubles we can see right now; rather, we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we will soon be over, but the joys to come will last forever. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

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We love deeper and cherish each day given to us because of our trials and joys in this journey of life.